First of all – parrots are not dogs. why are people so weirded out by quiet people? It's hard to imagine that a man might be less afraid of … Sure, I had plenty of friends when I was a kid, but I was always known as the "quiet girl" who didn't say too much. No, I didn't have friends coming out of my a**, but it's not like I was anti-social. During the day, you can do whatever you can to keep yourself busy so that you stop yourself from over-thinking - during the night, however, the only thing you can do is think. If you are confident you will end up saying unpleasant things to the person involved then staying quiet even at the cost of irritating the opponent is worth it. I think I was born shy. You contacted him and he was polite but it doesn't mean he wants to be with you. Vocal clues or changes in vocalization: Your cat may meow more or less than usual. At times their motivation for telling you you're quiet isn't as innocuous. Do not lean in and contact him, ask him questions, put him on the spot. If he would just enjoy happiness and beauty with me instead of needing to be the center of it all. I truly believe words spilt cannot be recovered. It can be frustrating and often you'll feel bad afterwards for having been so out of control with your anger. We shouldn’t assume that just because they are quiet they will put up with bad behavior either. 3) We’re silent because we’re angry. Ask the quiet person why he’s so quiet. But don’t worry, there are ways to handle this dreaded question. If you can’t let go of the relationship (say it’s a co-worker), can you let go of thinking so much about them? This isn’t such a good one. That’s not who Jesus Christ calls me to be. Sometimes, they really do just need to zone out and not talk. There are about 10 million reasons why someone might not talk very much, running the gamut from being shy, to hating you, to having sold their voice to a witch in return for legs. Men can go silent for a number of reasons. In fact, quiet people are often strong, creative, intuitive and brilliant. Ever since I was young, I've always been quiet and shy. You just know that's how you feel. How to Figure Out Why an Autistic Person Is Upset. If you don't feel you can release your anger in a healthy way, you might also turn this inwards on yourself. I know I did. The best thing to do may be to let go of the relationship. We will then either apologize for our wrongs or give you the wrath of my fury over your. Offer calm, quiet time together to help you and your dog relax, say reading a book or listening to soft music, she says. Either way, shit gets sorted! Now that I look back, as quiet as I was, I still made friends. People out there have a lot of funny ideas about quiet people, the worst one being that all quiet people are alike. He's Holding Back His Love Out Of Fear. So maybe instead of asking why many girls don't open up when they're upset (they do, but mostly not with guys who don't understand us), in a way it would make more sense asking why guys prefer it that way. I don’t want to be foolish or rude or tear anybody down by my words. Purrs do not always indicate happiness and an unhappy kitty might also purr more as a way to comfort themselves as well. Why are you staying with someone who causes you so much upset and pain? This could mean that you tend to suppress your anger and it becomes a long-term problem, where you react inappropriately to new situations you’re not comfortable with. Often I don’t talk because I render myself unable to do so by how much I think and overthink and think some more. Maybe you snap (or want to snap) at everyone around you -- because your anger feels like a tsunami. These unhappy noises are usually low-pitched, mournful yowls. If I were in that situation, I would continue to act normally and do my own thing. I dont go out of my way to talk to people or make friends. However how do I when he plucks every pedal of happiness and beauty from me. Sometimes, people become quiet and shut down during arguments because the other party becomes overwhelming and/or may have a high need to always be right in every situation. wrongs. Believe me, it’s not that easy to make an INFJ upset, or even angry for that matter. I always want to fit in but I can’t think of anything to say. ‘Quiet’ BPD is acting in, rather than acting out, but internalizing all the emotions they feel. Silence doesn't necessarily mean disinterest, indifference, passivity, insensitivity or being upset (sad, angry or depressed). Visualize: See the other as a little child who was powerless. Maybe you feel angry regularly. They may think you're angry or upset if you're not saying much, and think they're helping you talk about it by mentioning you're quiet. Asking a quiet person why he’s so quiet is probably the easiest and most effective way of making him feel bad. 8. But this question can completely throw us off balance. Quiet people watch and listen and when they have all the information they need, they act. Sometimes, they do get frozen with work stress. Here are 6 magnificent responses to “why are you so quiet?” 1. Manhood has its conundrums. He was just being polite. I bet they aren’t spending so much time thinking about you. We are taught to treat women with respect (the good men are taught that, anyway), and yet we are expected to communicate even when we are so angry that we don’t feel capable of communicating respectfully. They may have made the common mistake of thinking you're not saying a lot because you're snobby and aloof. So when the people I love — the people I do all of this for — walk into the house and drop their shit right there in the doorway and put nothing away, or leave the kitchen a mess for me to clean up after griping about the meal I made that “tasted horrible,” or leave piles of dirty clothes and Twix wrappers all over their rooms, I’m angry. Sometimes there’s something deeper hiding beneath their silence – other times, they may just really be tired or have zoned out for a while. Sometimes they really are tired. You're about to learn what some of them are, how it's connected to having different "relationship" needs than yours, and why this passive aggressive stance man mat take appears silent and unresponsive to the love you want to give him. Reason 2: Sharing Feelings Is Hard “Women often don’t understand how very hard it is for men to express their feelings. Because we don’t want to talk damn it!. You may not even know why you feel so angry all the time. These are very audible indications that your cat may be unhappy. Quiet people have stronger brains because they take time to reflect. I’m stuck in my mind. Ride the upset like a wave that will soon come to shore. “Most people report that they get angry once or twice a week,” Kassinove says, “but people who rate high for the anger trait become angry about once a day. You're irritable, short-tempered and grouchy. The world can sometimes be an overwhelming or painful place for autistic people, and they may not always have the language to describe it. usualy stick to myself and dont bother anyone. I don’t want to spout off angry nonsense. The fears of abandonment, mood swings, anxiety, self-injurious behaviors, impulsiveness and even suicidal tendencies and black and white thinking (splitting) are all part of being a quiet borderline. Then you know his true feelings. Try doing little nice things for her, but don't overly coddle her and make her feel suffocated. Often the one who makes you feel like crap is … It’s not so much a “can’t talk” with me as it is a “don’t want to talk.” I too feel a ton of thoughts rushing through my head, but I feel like I can’t assemble them into a coherent argument while I’m so upset. The best thing a woman can do is "lean back" and see what a man does. And if we don’t value you, We don’t even give you I know why my husband is moody and I know what I need to do to fix it. He doesn’t try to enjoy the children or the grandchildren and gets upset that I do. The best thing you can do for your brain is to give it a break and allow it to soak up what's around you. The best thing to do is let it go and go on with your own life. But those emotions are typically acted against ourselves. Silence helps us … There will be a circle of people talking and I’ll get sucked into it. Once we understand why our feathered friends do what they do, we are less likely to be angry with them and are able to build a relationship together from which both benefit (you and your pet). Some women will go silent or anti-social because they want space. A large number of INFJs face this struggle on a daily basis. So watch out that you don’t upset the quiet one – you could be in for a shock. people always assume im sad or depressed because im a quiet guy. Men get quiet for all kinds of reasons. 10: We Capricorns go silent because we are processing our emotions, trying to rationalize, view it from each way, usually 2-3 days. Quiet BPD can take time to identify, but the sooner you understand your symptoms, the sooner you can take action. When you close your eyes to fall asleep, the only thing you can do is think, and your mind immediately goes to over-think mode, so you start to feel depressed. A man will hold back his love from you for many reasons. 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